Sunday, May 27, 2012
Worth fighting for?
Love is what makes anything worth fighting for.
If Love is not in the equation then forget the battle. It is a waste of time.
Love is the reason to live or die. Sacrificing for another is what has made all the positive difference in the world. Giving your best effort to figure problems out and to make dreams real, standing up for the weak, setting a good example of bravery and trust in the Good, thinking of others and the future more than mere comfort today--these are gifts humans can give each other.
If you are talking about a relationship, it comes down to Love as well.
Even though we are imperfect, fighting for the Love we share is still valid.
Love is an action as well as a feeling. It means acting unselfishly for another's best interest and the best interest of the relationship. It means defending both against who and/or whatever would destroy it. It is digging deep, even during times of doubt, to be true to a worthy partner. It is clarifying that the relationship is a priority.
If you don't fight, what are you left with?
Physical fighting may not be what is required or recommended but there needs to be one's best effort shown to give meaning to one's vow of loyalty.
Saturday, May 12, 2012
mom day
Training has taught me to be numb to most emotions
Most relationships end due to my coldness
I have always retreated from touch
Tonight I stare at my babies
They need my touch my love and protection
For the first time I realize that I might need that too
Who is strong enough to take that on?
We will see
or maybe I should conform?
I love you mom, you are my hero...
Happy Mothers Day Mom
Saturday, April 28, 2012
sunfish
I slept
His arm held me close
I was sleeping in a hammock rocking in the breeze
cool and sweet
Aroma of musk and sweet pine
I was sailing on the open water
I could see innocent children
skipping rocks on the beach
the sun glistening off of their blond hair
Everything at peace
I sleep
Knowing his arms are around me no matter where I go
I am at peace
Smelling and tasting his love
Sailing with faith and happiness
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Always on the run
I was born...
Into a home of love and trust
God had a plan for me
She said in that old apartment one day,
"lady you have a halo around you, you will do great things and prosper"
I didn't know her and she was crazy
Who am I
I am distant from reality
Do I resist this greatness that she talked about
I protect and hide this anger
The light is within grasp
I am invincible
and meek
Hungry
for the...
Cross
and the love, the eternal love
where I can hold his hand
rocking in my chair
looking at
golden wheat
in the
wind
The smell of the wet
rain in my hair
running
like a child
Into a home of love and trust
God had a plan for me
She said in that old apartment one day,
"lady you have a halo around you, you will do great things and prosper"
I didn't know her and she was crazy
Who am I
I am distant from reality
Do I resist this greatness that she talked about
I protect and hide this anger
The light is within grasp
I am invincible
and meek
Hungry
for the...
Cross
and the love, the eternal love
where I can hold his hand
rocking in my chair
looking at
golden wheat
in the
wind
The smell of the wet
rain in my hair
running
like a child
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
Reluctance
Out through the fields and the woods
And over the walls I have wended;
I have climbed the hills of view
And looked at the world,
and descended;
I have come by the highway home,
And lo, it is ended.
The leaves are all dead on the ground,
Save those that the oak is keeping
To ravel them one by one
And let them go scraping and creeping
Out over the crusted snow,
When others are sleeping.
And the dead leaves lie huddled and still,
No longer blown hither and thither;
The last lone aster is gone;
The flowers of the witch hazel wither;
The heart is still aching to seek,
But the feet question "Whither?"
Ah, when to the heart of man
Was it ever less than a treason
To go with the drift of things,
To yield with a grace to reason,
And bow and accept the end Of a love or a season?
Robert Frost
And over the walls I have wended;
I have climbed the hills of view
And looked at the world,
and descended;
I have come by the highway home,
And lo, it is ended.
The leaves are all dead on the ground,
Save those that the oak is keeping
To ravel them one by one
And let them go scraping and creeping
Out over the crusted snow,
When others are sleeping.
And the dead leaves lie huddled and still,
No longer blown hither and thither;
The last lone aster is gone;
The flowers of the witch hazel wither;
The heart is still aching to seek,
But the feet question "Whither?"
Ah, when to the heart of man
Was it ever less than a treason
To go with the drift of things,
To yield with a grace to reason,
And bow and accept the end Of a love or a season?
Robert Frost
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
mozart and bread
Katrien
The girl from Now Zad, I wonder about her daily. Does her brother still pick on her, is she beaten daily for being a girl. Does she still have a beautiful smile? I would love to brush her hair and put a sparkly barrette in it. I remember it matted with blood and dirt and the fear in her eye when I went to grab a stick out of it. She crouched in horror, So I crouched down next to her and gave her a piece of candy. I reassured her that I wasn't going to hurt her. She was an orphan. Who will be there to strengthen her and tell her it will all be ok?
I am thankful for my parents, the ones who taught me how to walk on my own two feet. They took me to the ocean side to smell the salty air and tippy toe on the drift wood, they made sure I knew how to walk the streets of the big city. My Father taught me the art of working through a sweat, scraping poles with a draw knife and digging holes till I had calluses on my palms.We spent hours building things, and working on the property through various projects. The pride and joy that he instilled in me, after finishing a project with my own two hands is a gift that I can not thank him enough for. My Mother gave me the gift of laughter and love. No matter how populated a place was, I was sure to find her through the contagious Kim laugh. Through all my trials and tribulations, she loved me for me and encouraged me to be exactly that, me. She would bake bread while Mozart was in the background and I like to keep the fresh home baked bread aroma in the home a family tradition, because homemade bread is a gift of love.
I hope that my children will grow up to be strong and courageous with a yearning to know more and see more. Through their hard work and dedication I know they will do great things. I hope that I can teach them and love them through it. When they fail I hope they learn how to pick themselves up again and try harder. I hope they are spontaneous and laugh and love like I do.
“Children will not remember you for the material things you provided, but for the feeling that you cherished them.”
~ Richard Evans
The girl from Now Zad, I wonder about her daily. Does her brother still pick on her, is she beaten daily for being a girl. Does she still have a beautiful smile? I would love to brush her hair and put a sparkly barrette in it. I remember it matted with blood and dirt and the fear in her eye when I went to grab a stick out of it. She crouched in horror, So I crouched down next to her and gave her a piece of candy. I reassured her that I wasn't going to hurt her. She was an orphan. Who will be there to strengthen her and tell her it will all be ok?
I am thankful for my parents, the ones who taught me how to walk on my own two feet. They took me to the ocean side to smell the salty air and tippy toe on the drift wood, they made sure I knew how to walk the streets of the big city. My Father taught me the art of working through a sweat, scraping poles with a draw knife and digging holes till I had calluses on my palms.We spent hours building things, and working on the property through various projects. The pride and joy that he instilled in me, after finishing a project with my own two hands is a gift that I can not thank him enough for. My Mother gave me the gift of laughter and love. No matter how populated a place was, I was sure to find her through the contagious Kim laugh. Through all my trials and tribulations, she loved me for me and encouraged me to be exactly that, me. She would bake bread while Mozart was in the background and I like to keep the fresh home baked bread aroma in the home a family tradition, because homemade bread is a gift of love.
I hope that my children will grow up to be strong and courageous with a yearning to know more and see more. Through their hard work and dedication I know they will do great things. I hope that I can teach them and love them through it. When they fail I hope they learn how to pick themselves up again and try harder. I hope they are spontaneous and laugh and love like I do.
“Children will not remember you for the material things you provided, but for the feeling that you cherished them.”
~ Richard Evans
Sunday, January 22, 2012
scalding
I like to be tough and have it together (well look that way).
Engine academy in Naches washignton was for one week June 2005. I had just broken up with my boyfriend of 6 years. I packed up my Chevy Silverado to camp for the week, alone and all tough. Instead of claiming perdium and getting put up in a hotel I was going to camp on the Naches River.
Night 1
Jack Johnson and Chris Isaac on the truck radio.
Steak and mushrooms cooking on my hibachi
6 pack of beer
word search
my tent set up
it equalled an excellent night.
In the mornig I was up and at em.
I made camp coffee had some jerkey and I was on my way to class.
Night 2
music changed to Rob Zombie and Alice in chains
hot dog on my hibachi, chips and salsa box of wine...started
equalled an ok night morning, camp coffee and some cereal.
Night 3 last night...
made some soup in my jet boil listened to music...
can't remember what.
Morning....
Well I decided I needed a bath so I jumped in the icy river...jumped out washed all my important parts and jumped back in. I then decided it would be a good idea to wash my hair with my hot water on the stove to warm me up... Whoops. Needless to say I lost some hair that week and blistered my scalp, but I was clean.
Why didn't I stay in a hotel like everyone else? They all partied and had a good time that week. Well I had a campfire every night and danced to the music I liked. I slept next to the sound of the river and had little acorns drop on me in the middle of the night. I got to go wood hunting after class every night and explore the countryside. I close my eyes and taste the river and smell the dry grass of the Naches valley.
Engine academy in Naches washignton was for one week June 2005. I had just broken up with my boyfriend of 6 years. I packed up my Chevy Silverado to camp for the week, alone and all tough. Instead of claiming perdium and getting put up in a hotel I was going to camp on the Naches River.
Night 1
Jack Johnson and Chris Isaac on the truck radio.
Steak and mushrooms cooking on my hibachi
6 pack of beer
word search
my tent set up
it equalled an excellent night.
In the mornig I was up and at em.
I made camp coffee had some jerkey and I was on my way to class.
Night 2
music changed to Rob Zombie and Alice in chains
hot dog on my hibachi, chips and salsa box of wine...started
equalled an ok night morning, camp coffee and some cereal.
Night 3 last night...
made some soup in my jet boil listened to music...
can't remember what.
Morning....
Well I decided I needed a bath so I jumped in the icy river...jumped out washed all my important parts and jumped back in. I then decided it would be a good idea to wash my hair with my hot water on the stove to warm me up... Whoops. Needless to say I lost some hair that week and blistered my scalp, but I was clean.
Why didn't I stay in a hotel like everyone else? They all partied and had a good time that week. Well I had a campfire every night and danced to the music I liked. I slept next to the sound of the river and had little acorns drop on me in the middle of the night. I got to go wood hunting after class every night and explore the countryside. I close my eyes and taste the river and smell the dry grass of the Naches valley.
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